Wednesday, January 16, 2008

How to Raise a Douchebag

I truly did contemplate using a less disparaging title for this post.
However, currently exhausted after sleepless nights with a teething baby, I am grumpy and feeling judgemental. So there you have it.

Seriously though, if you are interested in raising your sweet baby as a full-fledged douchebag, here is my recommended text list for your child's fist year -- these are infant friendly boardbooks, no less.

for your aspiring Ali G

if your baby has moved past his 15 minutes of teething

Gucci Gucci Goo!

a graceful transition from strained winter squash to raw fish

This book didn't seem to fit the douchebag criteria, at first, and then I flipped it over . . .

Your little darling deserves the very best, so feed them more than caviar from that silver spoon. Nurture them with ART! It's never too early to be a Petit Connoisseur.

(Nor is it ever too earlyto cultivate a Petit Douchebag, apparently)

Oh, and let us not forget about this fantastic little nugget . . .


Anonymous said...

Me thinks your husband is getting into the right business. Maybe he can bottle your sense of humor to share with the rest of us. Nice graphics.

Your western parent.

Reluctant Kerry said...

What are you implying??? That i NEED to be married to a psychiatrist?

That stings a little - mostly because it is true . . .

Shelly said...

I'm a bit behind on your blog and just now catching up.

Seriously. Are those real kids books. That explains how some real douchebags got to where they are now!

Reluctant Kerry said...

Yes. Real children's books -- BOARD books! You can get all of them on